Choose Your Friends Wisely Like an alcoholic, if we allow ourselves to keep company with the element of anxiety / anger, we eventually fall off the wagon and it seems as though we have to endure an even greater battle of emotional and mental stress to get back up again. It's easier to just remain in denial and tell ourselves we have had enough, putting the wall up and having "Mr. Depression" become our best friend. No matter which way we look at it, regardless of the circumstances, our expression of anger or harboring it inside ourselves is a conscious choice that cannot be affixed to anyone else. Each new day when we wake up is a brand new day; whatever happened yesterday cannot be changed.
The key element to remember is that we may never shake some of the memories of past. We make the decision whether each new day is one in which we allow our memory and emotions to control our actions and health.
Joyful or Furious? For our entire life to this point we have been trained by our life experience to visually make our emotional state clear. When we are extremely happy, our action can vary from a serious hug with someone to a joyful laugh. On the flip side however, anger can become evident from a serious frown and/or foul language, to physical assault or worse. Anger can affect your internal organs, digestion, sleep, mood, and have an effect on a substantial number of other physiological processes. When we get angry, the heart rate, arterial tension and testosterone production increases, cortisol (the stress hormone) decreases, and the left hemisphere of the brain becomes more stimulated. No matter what the personality profile is of a person; whether reserved or assertive, the body responds according to the emotional state of the individual. Does it not make more sense to gain a greater understanding of your emotions and the impact they play on your body?
Mildly Annoyed? As I bring this article to a close, I wanted to save the best for last. The old saying "Nobody's perfect" really proved itself true in my own life. I used to have quite the collection of skeletons in the closet, memories of traumatic experiences that combined were making control of my emotions quite challenging. I too was desiring to change, to gain a better grip on my anger yet it seemed like such a useless effort. Easy to teach others to take control yet not as easy to apply what I knew would work on myself. My strong inner-desire for improvement has caused me to begin to drawing upon the schooling for my profession that I had failed to tap into for so many years. My focus was on anger and the detrimental effects upon the body. I established a logical theory to prove. What if I could strive to eliminate the use of any term associated with anger or similar emotional state from my vocabulary usage and instead replace it all with the term, "mildly annoyed"? That seemed simply enough. Little did I know, the opportunity to validate my theory was soon to be coming.
A perfect example of proving my theory came soon after. I had a challenging situation with an individual, testing my calm demeanor. The person Granted, at first I began to allow my shouted an abundance of offensive statements that would cause emotions to be challenged; then suddenly I remembered my commitment to change. I calmly told the person the following: "All I have to say is I am nothing more than mildly annoyed. Get a life!" The end result of that situation was rather comical! The person was well beyond the point of furious. While the individual was was striving push my emotions to the limit, in my mind it was a moment of humor! I left calm and somewhat jovial over taking command of the situation and not giving in to my emotions. The feeling I experienced following that situation was incredible and I wanted more! I enjoy being "mildly annoyed". I invite you to take that approach for a test drive yourself. It is our own decision what we do with our lives no matter what our age is. Why not step out on a new path where you feel nothing more than being "mildly annoyed" with your anger?
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